I ain’t afraid of no ghosts…
August 6, 2008
The other night, while sitting down to a lovely dinner at a local restaurant with D, my sister-in law, her husband and their two sons, I was confronted with a Ghost of Sara Past. I would like to consider myself the type of person who can handle bumping into an ex with Jacqueline Kennedy like grace; calmly walking over in my perfectly pressed linen suit, smiling with my fresh looking acne free skin and reaching out my perfectly manicured hand for a polite shake of the hand to engage in appropriate conversation. I did not do any of these things. But, for your reading pleasure, here are the five things I did do.
1- Panic. Immediately start to sweat. Really, sweat. Noticeable rings under the arm pits and river running through my bra type of sweat.
2- Turn bright red and stumble over my chair as I attempt to run interception and make contact BEFORE the haunting ghost reaches the table.
3- Make instant decision that I will NOT be introducing ghost to my lovely family for the following reasons. 3.a. – Ghosts are scary, I love my nephews and do not want them to have ‘ghost of Sara past’ type nightmares for the rest of their lives. 3.b – Do not want D’s family to think I am the type of person who associates or once associated with the big mean ghost.
4- Loose all abilities to participate in meaningful conversation and find myself asking “so, how are you?” three times while nodding my head emphatically and not listening to one of the responses. Begin to hate ghost all over again for making me feel EXACTLY the same way I did while we dated, a decade ago.
5- Scurry back to table and quickly order a beer while burying my head in the menu. Respond to D’s question of “who was that” with “someone I used to know” and silently pray he lets it go. Spend the next few minutes calming down and thinking how lucky I am that D did in fact let it go. Not because he did not know something was up, but because he could see how uncomfortable I was and did not want to push me. I adore D. I might be afraid of ghosts.